How To Write a Eulogy

A 7 step guide to writing a eulogy that honours your loved one.

1. Interview family and friends

It may feel like the complete weight of remembering your loved one is on your shoulders. It’s alright to ask family members or friends to share their stories of your loved one. This process itself can be very cathartic, as the act of remembering and sharing can help in the healing process itself.

2. Tell a story (or stories)

Everyone at the service will appreciate your personal memories of your loved one. Share the details that matter to you. To think about a good story, try out some of these prompts:

  • What’s a favorite memory you have?
  • What made them laugh?
  • What was their proudest moment in life?
  • What did they most enjoy?
  • What’s a little known fact about your loved one?

These questions will help you to remember some enjoyable stories and can serve as a starting point.

3. Don’t think about it as public speaking

You might be speaking in front of a lot of people, and no one is judging you or analyzing what you’re saying. They’re simply listening and appreciating, and thinking about their own personal connection to the deceased. However, if you wish to feel more confident while delivering your lines, it can be helpful to write everything down in case you experience a moment of nerves, as we all often do.

4. Keep it brief

Share as much as you want to share, but don’t feel that you have to overburden yourself with pages of stories. Choose one or two that are most meaningful to celebrate the memory of your loved one.

5. Read it out loud

Before the service, read the speech out loud to yourself or to a trusted family member or friend. They’ll help calm any nerves, make any suggestions about what resonates the most with them or pick out any particularly inspirational elements to focus on further.

6. Humour heals

It’s OK, and perfectly acceptable, to be funny or tell a humorous story in a eulogy. At a time that brings sadness to many people, it is important and most helpful to be celebrating a life well lived with funny memories and entertaining anecdotes.

7. Take a deep breath

It can be difficult given all that you’re going through right now, but be at peace knowing that you are  honouring and celebrating your loved one.

Looking for some inspiration? Here are some examples of some truly inspiring words written in honour of deceased celebrities. And just remember, speak what you feel and your eulogy will turn out perfect.